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  • Bax Shapiro

OPINION: Umm… “She-Hulk?” How about… “He-Hulk.”

Updated: Oct 5, 2022

Man, do I miss the days of old comics. Super MAN, Bat MAN, Iron MAN, Spider MAN, Ant MAN, notice a trend? Things changed once the woke media got their hands on Marvel (Thanks sleepy Joe.) I have not (and will not) watch it, but I heard they made the She-Hulk twerk with a so-called Megan Thee Stallion? If Woke Marvel is all about equality these days, then why don’t they make a He-Hulk?

First of all, the so-called “She-Hulk” is not a believable protagonist. I mean… who would believe that a woman would occupy a profession such as “lawyer?” Umm... looks like a major plot hole in the show already. She-Hulk should take a page out of the critically acclaimed, male-directed Better Call Saul, a show that did true justice to the legal profession. Me and my fellow buddies, who typically watch media not to enjoy it, but to identify the countless ways that it is designed to satisfy the cultural Marxist agenda, mathematically AND factually determined that a “She-Hulk” would only be able to save 7 out of 10 civilians that a theoretical He-Hulk would be capable of saving. Isn’t that interesting…

Furthermore, he wouldn’t be sexualized and made to allure and entrance us like the so-called “She-Hulk.” He would not be made to shake his phat, green dumper, now would he? I certainly wouldn’t want to see it go up and down and up and down and up and…….. but that’s besides the point. I get carried away with my argumentative rhetoric occasionally when writing these, and I apologize if my readers are affronted by the crude imagery I employ for rhetorical purposes. 

At the end of the day, what’s fair is fair. When Marvel chooses to prioritize one gender over the other, they will always be in service to an agenda. Us, the eager viewers, are stuck with another “female superhero,” and are denied the opportunity to witness the glory of their broad-chested, powerful, and ultimately more bodacious, counterpart.

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