- Maxwell Maceluch
DR FAUCI CAUGHT BREWING UP NEW "DARK BRANDON" CUM STRAIN IN DEEP STATE LABORATORY! (FORMULA LEAKED)
Updated: Nov 10, 2022
A Mixture Most Foul... - By Me
Just when you thought it was safe… After his latest session of trapping beagles’ heads in cages full of flesh-eating insects, Dr. Anthony Fauci has been spotted inside his watchtower stirring a mixture most viral in his government-funded pot. Those that retained their sense of smell through the pandemic also noted the distinct chlorine-like scent of guy gunk whenever facing west within the last few weeks (since Big Pharma lies at the heart of Western Civilization). Its name is said to ring into the ears and hearts of said passersby like Sciencemas bells. Uttered without words, dispersing through the thick semen smell, the anticipation of airborne illness seeps into all, leaving but only a single transmission formed through the undulation of cerebral fluid: Dark Brandon.
We’ve already discussed the potential of cum at length, but new reports and insights indicate that what Fauci is cooking up is something the likes of which we have never felt before. The impending sense of foundational collapse by way of civil war, industry-wrought environmental disaster, and mass hysteria spurred on by ever-increasing individualized digital curation that you’ve been feeling lately is, in actuality, the body’s instinctual alarm system blaring off in preparation for its presence. “He’s been taking notes since lockdown first started,” one source suggested to me in a dream the other night, “He’s all but perfected it by now. May Fauci have mercy upon us all.”
This plea for humanity was echoed by the retired agents formally employed by the FBI’s Femboy FED Unit when they were called in to act as test subjects for his wicked guy goop by way of rectal administration. Words cannot even begin to describe what transpired; insiders on the scene compared witnessing it to the sublime sensation of simultaneously experiencing both birth and death under the light of a new color.
By entering “DarkBrandon” into the URL of the CDC’s official website, you can discover what they don’t want you to know about. That’s right. It holds the beta webpage for the cum outbreak that has yet to come. Curiously enough, if you to enter the page’s source code through a complex hacking process known as "Inspect Element", you can find what appears to be Fauci’s wicked recipe. It reads as follows:
Red No. 40 (6 gal.)
5G (100 w)
Ground-up Impossible Whopper (13 lbs.)
Seed oils (6 gal.)
Adrenochrome, (6 gal.)
Bug meat (11 lbs.)
Catboy essence (50 gal.) [NOTE: UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHOULD CATBOY ESSENCE BE SUBSTITUTED WITH FEMBOY ESSENCE.]
Fluoride water (80.08 gal.)
Corn syrup (13.37 gal.)
Malarkey (11 lbs.)
Whether microchips are baked into the "splooge sauce" itself or if they’re to be injected through the ensuing vaccine has yet to be leaked. In order to bypass deep state surveillance censorship techniques, the BUTT will be transmitting updates on this story directly to your brain tonight, during REM sleep.