Palpatine Silent Amid Growing Accusations of Genocide Against Jedi

The Human Rights Policy Institute on Alderaan added its voice this Monday to the growing volume of accusations that the Galactic Empire’s military action against the Jedi Order, which began in 32 BBY with the infamous “Order 66,” constitutes the legal definition of a genocide.

Nearly 10,000 Jedi were executed by imperial clone troopers during the opening hours of Order 66, including hundreds of children who were killed when the 501st clone battalion illegally occupied the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. The purge of Jedi has continued to the present day under the auspices of the imperial Inquisitorius, hunting down Jedi who escaped the initial purge. A representative of the Grand Inquisitor declined to comment on the growing accusations.

Despite the overwhelming agreement among genocide scholars, imperial officials continue to push back against the narrative. “The Jedi are terrorists,” stated a representative from the office of Darth Vader, “who betrayed the Republic to the Separatists. The Empire has a right to defend itself.”

Grand Moff Wilhuff Tarkin offered a comment, stating that “The Sith have an ancestral claim to the Jedi Temple and other Jedi territories dating back to 7,000 BBY, when they were driven out by the Great Schism and forced to take refuge on Korriban. The Jedi claim to their… I mean to our temple is actually incredibly shaky, historically speaking.”

BUTT reporters were also able to contact a Jedi refugee who survived Order 66, who for his own security wished to be referred to only as Ben. “Darth Vader is a punk-ass bitch,” Ben stated. “Yeah, he’s hot shit when he’s killing younglings, but the second he goes against an actual Jedi Master he folds like wet cardboard. Or should I say, burned cardboard, if you know what I mean. I hope he’s reading this. He should know I’ve got a real surprise cooking up for him over here. Two, actually.”

Despite numerous attempts made by the staff of the BUTT, the office of Emperor Palpatine could not be reached for comment.