Which Previously Eradicated Disease Do You Have? Take This Quiz!
- Freyja Gréta Björnisdottir
- Apr 29
- 1 min read

Which of the following best describes your symptoms?
A G O N Y
My peepnis fell off
Boils absolutely everywhere
I have a tummy ache
Which of the following contagions and/or infections have you been recently in contact with?
Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant Reactor 4
A leper colony
I killed a guy and drank his blood
Mosquitoes
How confident are you in your ability to beat a gnome in a fight?
Very confident
Somewhat confident
Unconfident
Not at all confident
Unsure
Rank the last 4 presidents of Mexico in terms of fuckability:
Claudia Sheinbaum Pardo (2024-present)
Andrés Manuel López Obrador (2018-2024)
Enrique Peña Nieto (2012-2018)
Felipe Calderón Hinojosa (2006-2012)
If you were a furry, which animal would you be?
Wolf
Wolf
Wolf
Wolf
Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?
Yes
No
I’m Jewish
Hail Satan!
Which of the following recreational drugs do you use?
Marijuana
Weed
Mary Jane
Reefer
Spliff
The Devil’s Lettuce
Where does it hurt?
Everywhere
My head
My heart
My soul
Right here
Rank the following 4 death metal albums:
Realm of Chaos: Slaves to Darkness by Bolt Thrower (1989)
Tomb of the Mutilated by Cannibal Corpse (1992)
Breeding the Spawn by Suffocation (1993)
The Palpable Leprosy of Pollution by Infant Annihilator (2012)
I should’ve asked this first, but do you have insurance?
Yes
No
Results:
If you answered mostly (a), you have: Measles
If you answered mostly (b), you have: The Bubonic Plague
If you answered mostly (c), you have: A Plague of Locusts
If you answered mostly (d), you are: A Hypochondriac
If you answered (b) to Question 10, you can: Get the Fuck Out
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