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Sam Wheeler

Emmanuel Macron Reaches 8% Approval Rating, Highest In French Electoral History



With President Macron securing the French general election just a little over a fortnight ago, the world has renewed its twice a decade interest in French politics. The election was initially a contentious one, with the French population unsure whether or not they wanted Emmanuel Macron, Marie Le Pen, or others in office (sorry French people, if I say there are more than two people in any election my American readers get really upset and confused). Ultimately, the French people chose to reelect President Macron, an utterly shining example of a 21st century politician. What’s surprising, however, is that Macron hit an 8% approval rating shortly after the election, something unheard of in French electoral history.


“You zee, us French are typique-ally a very contentiouz people” says Saison Margeurite, “we like to, how do you say, protest when we are unzatisfied with ze state of things, healzy for democracy I thinque, but I believe zat ze, how do you say, war in Ukraine has really brought us togezzer”. Pertinent and accurate words from Saison, as polls taken at voting stations show most French voters agreeing with Saison’s sentiment on unity in light of the war.


Others, however, disagree with Saison’s opinion on France’s national pastime of vibrant democratic discussion. Comedian Georges Carlineaux, in an expletive laden interview, says “We French ‘ave no right to complain about our ****ing politicions, where do zey think zese politiciones are coming from? Zey are not appearing out of zin ****ing air! Zey are born in French homes, raised in French schools, and go to French churches! We cannot complain if we keep electing zese fools! It’s trash in, trash eauxt, I zay”. Ironically, Georges loud proclamation of his beliefs only adds to France's strong democratic tradition as people from all around the country make their voices heard, but we won’t tell him that, of course.


Naturally, President Macron is riding his wave of popularity while he can and enjoying a few days’ vacation with his former-high-school-teacher turned wife before returning to the job. We at the BUTT wish him a smooth and efficient presidency! By the way Em, if you’re reading this, can you get us some tickets to the 2024 Paris Olympics? They’re kind of expensive dawg and we don’t have the funds for it.


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