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  • Gabby Cafaro

Top 10 Places to Hide from Your Situationship on Campus

When your delusionship, failed talking stage, or horrid breakup arises just in time for the upcoming semester it's important to know the wonderful amenities on campus to hide from those you’d rather not run into. I feel as though it is my duty as a Binghamton University student and BUTT member to inform those who are in desperate need of hibernation this time of year. Here are the top 10 places to hide from your situationship on campus:

10. The Anderson Center

Starting off strong, the Anderson Center is a great place to hide especially at night. With the large auditorium space and convenient location on lower campus, it's perfect to pop in and hide from that dreadful man who ghosted you after asking “what are we?” We’ve all been there.

9. Old Digman Meditation Circle

This gem on campus not only has a great location but allows you to tap into a more reflective approach. The meditation circle is a more relaxing option and allows for growth, reflection, and realizations such as “wait they weren't even that cute…”

8. The C4 Elevator

A more secretive spot that you wouldn’t typically think could be great for hiding. If you happen to see that one guy you made out with at Tom’s waiting for chicken fingers or have some time to kill, ride the elevator a few times. It's fun!

7. The Greenhouse

Another underrated location, with the perfect blend of serenity and privacy. Go into the greenhouse if you happen to spot that special someone you've been dying to talk to but haven’t mustered up the courage to do so. What's the worst that can happen?

6. 3rd Floor of Hinman Gender Neutral Bathroom

This spot is so good I almost don't want to give it up. Alas, the third floor of Hinman has a terrific gender neutral bathroom where you can spend as much time as you'd like in hiding. With the prime location of Hinman being a short stride to Lecture Hall a quick stop is harmless. Take a few deep breaths and remember while you're healing, he's balding! Rapidly…

5. Lecture Hall 8

Take advantage of this playful option and invite your friends for an emergency debrief in this desolate lecture hall room. Comes with complementary screens to showcase texts where he wronged you, see which Back at the Barnyard character accurately depicts him best, and create illustrations on the blackboards of how big it actually was. Key word, actually.

4. Any Classroom in Appalachian

A great option if you're willing to trek up that treacherous hill! In the basement of Appalachian, with beautiful chalkboard walls and flickering lighting it's perfect for that 2000s vintage feeling of existential dread. The chalkboards can be used to strategically map out exactly what he said the night you were supposed to hangout.

3. Science V Hallway

With doors locked on both sides and a narrow hallway filled with nothingness it's a perfect hiding spot especially to pace back and forth in.

2. The Preschool by East Gym

Another underground area on campus. If you didn't know, now you know, the preschool is a perfect place to hide however you are not guaranteed to blend in!

1. Breastfeeding Pod in the Union

The best place to hide would have to be the breastfeeding pod located in the beloved Union. Most walk by without even noticing the practicality it has. A great location paired with privacy serves as the perfect combination. See your failed talking stage on line at Dunkin Donuts? Have no fear, the breastfeeding pod is near! A quick sprint will get you there in no time.

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