Binghamton Global Taco Food Truck Leaves Cultural Identity “Open To Interpretation”
BINGHAMTON, NY— This semester, Binghamton University’s newly opened Global Taco Food Truck has made it more convenient than ever for students to catch food poisoning. Many students also enjoy the mystery of never knowing exactly where on campus the food truck is so when they finally locate it, they’ve already given up on it and bought dining hall food instead. Last week, several passersby recall spotting the food truck hiding in a bush somewhere near Old Rafuse. Since its installation back in August, the food truck has been able to attract a large clientele of students who can’t afford the Marketplace but cannot bear the thought of having to eat dining hall food for even one more meal. However, the mobile eatery has begun to face backlash on social media site X (formerly known as Twitter) for not having yet established any kind of authentic cultural identity for itself.
Baxter Bearcat made a public statement on X and ultimately declined to clarify the cultural identity of the Global Taco Food Truck, writing: “I don’t want to rule anything out.” Baxter then complicated matters by adding that the eating establishment is meant to incorporate “a culturally-appropriate amount of everything.” Distinguished professor Anne Throwpology, head of the Musical Theatre Department at Binghamton University, was very appreciative of Baxter’s response and quote tweeted that she herself is “happy to see the cuisines and cultures of people across the world combined and Americanized to a point beyond recognition.”
While not issuing a direct statement to address the issue, the Global Taco Food Truck is coincidentally offering major discounts and expanding its menu to include a new selection of items dubbed Late Night Exclusives. New menu options include the Great Value Brand Beef Taquitos, the Vegan Buffalo Cauliflower Tacos Cooked in Beef Grease, the Vegan Canned Green Beans in a Quesadilla, and the Street Mac-and-Cheese-Bites which the menu describes as “Tyson brand Mac-and-Cheese-Bites with Frank’s Hot Sauce poured on.”
At press time, Dean Harvey Stenger and his team of advisors were seen finalizing plans to develop a sister restaurant called “The Global Sesame Chicken and Broccoli Combo Food Truck.”