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  • Max Lieber

Jack Skellington Begins Hatching Devious Plan to Ruin Santacon


This is Halloween, and Jack Skellington is already deciding on ways to ruin the holiday spirit for everyone. It seems that he has begun formulating a plan to potentially ruin this year's Santacon. During a special Halloween interview that we were able to secure with Mr. Skellington, Jack hinted at some sort of "ingenious plot" he had in the works for the upcoming holiday season. He remained vague throughout the interview when pressed for details about the plan itself.


"This… This will be something remarkable. I shall do something so horrible that every student at the Binghamton School will detest me for the rest of their lives. They will learn to truly fear me after I deprive them of their treasured day of joviality and merriment!"


As for his motivations behind the scheme, Mr. Skellington has stated that Santacon has become "his new obsession".


"I have observed the behavior of the townspeople and school children during this holiday, and I must say that it both disgusts and fascinates me. They seem to partake in the strange act that they call "drinking", which I am still perplexed by."


While specific details surrounding the plan are hazy, it is suspected that Jack will hold his own festival at the same time as Santacon, called "Skellingtoncon". The BUTT believes that preparation for the event may have already begun. Jack's base of operations, which a few leads say is located in one of the abandoned buildings within Johnson City, has reportedly been quite active as of late. JC residents report hearing strange noises emanating from the building, such as maniacal laughter and ear-splitting industrial machinery. Some even attest to hearing child-like voices occasionally singing an annoyingly repetitive, yet catchy song:


Santacon, Santacon

We're gonna ruin Santacon

We love to sing a song

About how we're gonna ruin Santacon

Jack hopes to end Santacon for good, but it is unclear if doing such a thing would even be possible due to it being such an anticipated event among the student body. However, a number of fraternities and sororities have recently inexplicably announced that they are no longer interested in this year's Santacon, and intend on participating in Skellingtoncon instead. Some students have even been spotted wearing Skellingtoncon shirts and hoodies on campus.


The Grinch also voiced his support for the plan, and may collaborate with Mr. Skellington in order to make his plan a reality. Rumor has it that The Leprechaun may have something similar in mind for Parade Day after having his gold stolen by a fraternity pledge, but only time will tell if these rumors turn out to be true.





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